So, how do those who divorce due to betrayal of emotions end up later?

Regarding this issue, of course it’s not absolute, but generally speaking, those who divorce due to betrayal of emotions usually don’t end up well, at least more than those who have been betrayed and divorced.

Emotional betrayal, superficially speaking, is the result of incorrect concepts about emotions, marriage, and family. All those who betray emotions must have issues with their concepts of marriage and emotions. This is not directly related to whether the marriage itself has problems or whether the spouse is good enough. It’s all about having the right concepts. Those with correct concepts would at most get a divorce, but would not betray.

On a deeper level, emotional betrayal is actually a personality obstacle. It’s either a result of personal selfishness or avoidance of problems. If you objectively look at those who betray emotions, you will easily find that most of them are inherently selfish, calculating, indifferent, ungrateful, and unappreciative. On the other hand, they are used to causing trouble while avoiding responsibility. Another interpretation of betrayal is a way of escaping the responsibility of emotions and marriage.

Therefore, those who betray emotions possess these traits and attributes, making it difficult for them to lead a smooth life.

After betraying emotions, if a person cannot fundamentally recognize their own problems, then they cannot truly change themselves. They might think that stopping the betrayal is enough. However, the deeper personality and character issues remain.

Another issue to discuss is that if a person who betrays emotions does not divorce, then their betrayal is almost without consequences. This is why in a marriage with betrayal, the one who betrayed may act as if nothing happened, even arrogantly, while the one who was betrayed suffers greatly. This is because the betrayer does not face the consequences of their betrayal and is not truly affected by it, especially when the one who was betrayed becomes even more attentive and caring after the betrayal. It’s a psychological signal that the betrayer is not afraid of or respectful towards betrayal, but instead encourages it.

A person doesn’t commit a crime for only two reasons: either they naturally don’t want to or they are afraid of the consequences. When someone chooses to betray emotions, it means the first reason is no longer possible. Therefore, to prevent betrayal, the person must be unable to bear the consequences of betrayal. This is the reality. Don’t expect someone who betrays emotions to suddenly realize their mistake and change for the better.

Of course, divorce is also a consequence, and it’s a heavy one. Losing a happy marriage and a warm family due to betrayal is a regretful loss that many people experience and deeply regret.

In the case of betrayal leading to divorce, the feelings of the betrayer and the betrayed are different. The one who was betrayed, as long as they adjust themselves and work hard, has a great possibility of future happiness. On the other hand, the one who betrayed emotions often finds it difficult because they caused the past events. Furthermore, the one who was betrayed remains innocent throughout, while the one who betrayed emotions has a stain on their life. When young, this might not seem significant, but as people grow older, they will face the task of making peace with themselves. Only when a person can face their life without guilt will they truly be at peace.

After all this, you might think that this is leading towards advising divorce.

Actually, it’s not. This is just stating some real issues and hoping to remind those who have experienced emotional betrayal not to choose divorce because of the so-called “consequences”.

After experiencing betrayal, many people have a mentality of revenge, trying to make the other person pay for their betrayal to realize their mistake—“If they are not doing well, that’s the consequence.”

This kind of thinking is unnecessary.

The fundamental decision of whether to divorce is based on oneself, not on the other person. In other words, the decision about the marriage should be based on one’s own happiness, not on predicting whether the other person is doing well or not.

Those who divorce due to betrayal and end up doing well afterwards usually don’t care about how the other person is doing, because not caring is more relieving than seeing the other person doing badly.

There are many perspectives to discuss on this topic:

First, doing well or not is just a change. This idea of doing well or not is a kind of comparison, possibly between the present and the future, or between each other. Therefore, the fundamental thing is to live well for oneself.

Second, of course, there are also people who divorce due to betrayal and still do very well. There are two explanations for this. The first explanation is “nothing is absolute”. The second explanation is that life is not just about marriage and emotions. Perhaps the person who betrayed emotions is not doing well in this aspect, but they might be doing well in other aspects. Life is holistic, and the one who was betrayed is the same. Misery and unhappiness are limited to emotions and marriage. Don’t let this “not doing well” affect your entire life.

Third, some people say, “They betrayed me and even actively forced me to divorce… If this is the case, there is no need to worry about whether the other person is doing well. The focus and effort should be purely on oneself. In simple terms, fight for yourself.

To sum it up, if there is no divorce, these issues are purely theoretical. If the divorce has already happened, then why would it matter whether the other person is doing well or not? We must discuss all of the above, and only then will you accept this statement.