A friend said that his work status this year was very good, with two promotions and salary increases. But if my boyfriend is unhappy, he will get angry if he receives a work call during a date, and working overtime on weekends will also cause quarrels. I used to be busier at work than now, and I never saw him react so violently. Shouldn’t we support our girlfriend’s motivation and excellent work? Could it be that living a lazy life, working hard and taking care of things can make him happy?

Because I don’t understand, I can’t solve this friend’s emotional problems. But I wanted to write a few words on this topic.

1

The world is huge. When one person and another person meet, know, and fall in love, only if they become a positive factor in each other’s growth and make each other become better people, can it be beautiful enough, stable and lasting.

Without affecting the normal relationship between the two, the girlfriend actively pursues the life she wants and provides sufficient support and encouragement. This is a qualified attitude of a qualified partner. Therefore, girlfriends are better, and boyfriends should work hard to make progress at the same time, instead of playing with emotions or even blocking each other’s progress.

A certain celebrity once said in an interview: “The marriage I know is like that of my parents, who give to each other and achieve each other.”

This interpretation of marriage is also applicable to love.

Vital feelings never restrict each other. It’s about finding a balance between two different and independent individuals besides me accommodating you and you accommodating me.

Even though I really want to fall in love with you all the time, I hope you know that love is a part of our lives. To have a better love, we must first have a better you and me.

Even if you are very busy with work and study and I can’t help you much, I hope you can take time to communicate with me instead of keeping silent, because sharing will make our thoughts synchronize.

Even if you don’t agree with my interests and career, I hope you will give me the most respect within your cognizable range, instead of blindly blocking and interfering.

……

2

The best love is not about who becomes someone’s appendage or how much someone gives up for whom, but because of this love and wanting to give each other a better future, both people love life more and become more active. Good people achieve a more fulfilling life.

A best friend once told me that her ideal boyfriend is one who has a higher quality of life together. If you are in love and your spiritual and material levels are not as good as when you are alone, then why do you want to be together?

She said that it is very troublesome to establish an intimate relationship between people. Together, for a better self; apart, also for a better self. If 1+1 is greater than two, everyone is happy; if 1+1 is less than 1, both parties suffer.

Indeed, it is easy to meet feelings, but not easy to manage. When feelings come, they are so charming and so easy to get lost.

I have heard too many middle school students and college students give up their studies and life because of falling in love. That was at an age when we didn’t understand love yet. We thought love was just being in a daze and being lazy together. We thought that as long as we managed love well, it would be the best future.

I have also seen some girls around me regard love as the only fulcrum in life after falling in love, and give in everything for love. They use “love first” as a shield for their laziness and enjoyment, thinking that love can replace self-growth. In the end, youth was wasted and love was not grasped.

However, the most romantic thing is not that there is only love in the youth of two people, but that there is youth and a future in the love of two people. Turning the love between two people into a lifelong affair is an irreplaceable beauty.

3

I prefer another version of the love story.

A boy and a girl in a high school class like each other, and they meet in London. In the most stressful year, encourage each other to work harder. A year later, they were admitted to the two best universities in that ancient city, and it was natural for them to become a couple. “In high school, you and I were at the front and back desks; in college, you and I were door to door.” This is the most beautiful thing.

In the journey of life, when you meet another person, you are not tied with your hands and feet, but with a booster, holding hands and moving forward, evenly matched, is the best love.

It is better to appreciate each other and achieve each other than to be slaves to love. The best way for lovers to get along is to become better and more outstanding together, rather than to stay together.

Everyone is an independent individual, and the connection with anyone, together, is to become a better each other. Such an intimate relationship is meaningful.

4

In addition to lovers, many stable relationships are like this, between friends, between relatives, between colleagues…

The best relationship is not about receiving and giving, not about being bound and fettered, nor about sacrificing and making do with each other, but about giving to each other, appreciating each other, and achieving each other.

The real “good thing for her” is definitely not holding on to her clothes when she wants to take off. It’s not like you pluck out your own feathers and spend the night with her. For her own good, let’s take off together—work hard to set sail, and give him a helping hand.

A parent’s love for a child is not to tie her to him, but to give her the ability to no longer be dependent and achieve her blue sky;

The sincerity of friends to friends is not “I hope you are happy, but not happier than me”, but is to support each other and achieve each other’s bright future;

Between lovers, she wants the comfort of the moment, and you work hard to achieve her worldly fireworks; she wants poetry and distance, and you escort her through the thorns of life and move towards the ideal distance…

If you think about it carefully, whether it is with lovers, friends, parents, brothers and sisters, no matter how long or short the time together is, when they enter our lives, they all come with kindness and appreciation. This feeling is heavy, and the original intention is “I hope you will be better.”

May we remain true to our original aspirations, work hard individually, and achieve mutual success.