Is there an interesting phenomenon that you have discovered?

Whether it is a small family or a large family, the foundation is blood. However, the person with whom we have the closest relationship—our spouse, is precisely the one who is not related by blood.

When we become adults, this unrelated spouse is the person with whom we have the closest relationship, both in a legal sense and in practical life.

Sometimes it’s scary to think about it. In most countries, if a person loses consciousness in an accident, the default first agent is the spouse, whether in medical decision-making or legal matters. In other words, when a person is least able to protect himself, his life is entrusted to a person who is completely unrelated to him by blood. I think this must have caused conflicts and even tragedies.

In other words, the relationship between husband and wife is the core, the foundation, and the top priority of all relationships within the family. If you can get along well with the unrelated person around you, all other relationships will be easier to handle. For home construction, this is definitely twice the result with half the effort.

Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are not getting along? If the relationship between husband and wife is not good, it will make things worse; if the relationship between husband and wife is good enough, big problems can be reduced to small ones.

Having problems with your relationship with your children? If the relationship between husband and wife is not good, they will blame each other and try to win over each other; if the relationship between husband and wife is good enough, no matter how stubborn the children are, they will not be able to make a difference, and they can still love each other as before after going through puberty and menopause.

Therefore, don’t think that people who are already married and happily married don’t need to pay attention to the topic of gender relations. This should be a lifelong subject, one that needs to be learned as time goes by, and there will always be room for growth.

Different ages, or different stages of life, often have significantly different views on sexual relations.

Young people pay more attention to love. Does he love me? How much do you love me? Is it good enough for me? Do I love him or not? Once you are in love, you will not let go despite all difficulties. Even if you suffer, you can still be moved.

Most of the middle-aged people who have lost their passion in marriage for many years pay more attention to whether they can cooperate and support each other. Love alone is useless, you have to make me live comfortably. As long as you live a nourishing life, even if there is no love, it’s not a big deal. There is still family affection cultivated over time, right?

I think there is no right or wrong between the above two states, they are just different stages of life. Whatever stage you are in, just devote yourself to doing what you should do at that stage.

When I was young, I loved wildly and desperately, and tasted the ups and downs of love. I have to admit that youth is a kind of capital, with little burden and good health. It is understandable to be free at this time.

In middle age, when there are seniors and juniors, everything that needs to be experienced has been experienced, and the focus turns to shouldering the responsibilities of the family. At this time, whether the other half can cooperate happily and work towards a common goal is the key most affects personal happiness.

Of course, different personalities have different needs for love and marriage.

Those who are more emotional and enjoy a rich spiritual world will still care about the feeling of love even if they live to be seventy or eighty years old. As long as you can truly feel love and being loved, any lack of material resources or physical hardship will not affect your happiness. But they can’t stand the fact that the marriage only exists for the sake of cooperation.

Those who are more rational and whose values are closer to the general public pay more attention to whether the survival of marriage can bring practical benefits. As long as it is beneficial to the children, as long as we can work together along the way to first become well-off, then become rich, and finally achieve financial freedom, that is the greatest happiness. As for how much love there is along the way, or whether there is love or not, it doesn’t matter, as long as the family is harmonious and harmonious.

Still, I think there is no distinction between the above two states. It is a matter of preference. The one that suits you is the best. There is no need to compare with others.

As for me, I hope that I can try not to go to extremes in my life, and it will be good for both rain and dew.

I know myself too well. By nature, I definitely belong to the type that needs spiritual enjoyment, and my desire and pursuit of material things are obviously lower than the mainstream. Therefore, when you are young, choosing a spouse depends entirely on the feeling of love. It is no exaggeration to say that you do not consider the slightest bit of worldly utility.

But after all, the stage of life is different. No matter how ungrounded your nature is, you can’t escape being polished by the superiors and subordinates. As a result, I can increasingly understand those marital life conditions that I couldn’t understand before.

Those numbing sweet words, those sticky touches and hugs, those little satisfactions of being pampered and loved… Even without these, they won’t have much impact on real life.

As long as the two of them can work together to build a small family, buy more beautiful cars, buy more houses, and leave one for each of the children, wouldn’t that be a full sense of accomplishment and happiness?

However, this sentence of “working together to contribute to the small family” does not come without effort. Why would your partner be willing to work hard together? Of course you have to pay something.

Even if you know that no one loves you that much, you must have the courage to give first, be willing to suffer first, and use sincerity to influence others.

I believe that “everyone is a mixture of good and evil.” But I believe more that “human beings are inherently good”.

Always remember, there will be reverberations.

As long as each other’s goals in life are the same, no matter whether you have ever loved passionately or not, and whether you are still in love or not, as long as you are willing to treat each other sincerely, you can walk hand in hand on the sunny road of happiness.